Reflections...
OH YOU HAVE MADE ME GLAD
HEAVEN NOW IS OPEN FOR ME
HOW COULD I BE SAD?
YOU HAVE MADE ME GLAD OH
YOU HAVE MADE ME GLAD
WITH ALL OF MY HEART
I GIVE YOU MY PRAISE
YOU HAVE MADE ME GLAD
YOU BROUGHT ME FROM THE DARKNESS
LORD INTO YOUR LIGHT
YOU TOOK ME TO YOUR KINGDOM
AND YOU GAVE MY EYES THEIR SIGHT
YOU FILLED MY HEART WITH GLADNESS
GAVE ME A NEW SONG
AND I WILL THANK YOU LORD
I WILL PRAISE YOU ALL DAY LONG
I WILL PRAISE YOU ALL DAY LONG
I read some articles written by some bloggers in the net yesterday. I was kind of like amazed with the kind of language and the way which they expresses themselves. How I wish I could express myself as well as they did.
I’m not giving myself any discounts. How I just wish to be just as knowledgeable and eloquent as they are. Although their contents were kind of like rants and complains but they were written in a colorful yet fun ways. Something which I would not be able to write even though I might tell a joke but it’s not gonna be as funny as how they expressed themselves.
Bloggers like the SPG and XiaXue are people I ought to learn from. (Not the vulgarities or the way they talk about each other but it’s the way they so freely express themselves.) I find that barrier for myself to be able to express myself clearly. I guess… that’s the major concern for myself. I simply cannot get through any messages to a person without causing misunderstandings. (I’m not looking for troubles, k?) Maybe it’s the personality and the character, which makes me who and what I am. I do not hate myself, as I’m unique in my own ways and rights.
Anyway, I am really amazed with the kind of exposures they have. Maybe I am really a mountain tortoise; one who’s not so exposed. Call me naïve or innocent or even gullible. I guess I’ll fall into traps or tricks easier than these two girls. Besides that, I lack that creativity and eloquence, which makes me somewhat a "stuck-up" as I seldom, talk much. However, when I start to talk on topics, which I do not know, I feel dumb and lame. Sigh…
Wow… I guess I’m focusing on the negative side of myself today; comparing to SPG and Xiaxue. Between the two, I guess I enjoy more of Xiaxue’s way of writing. She sounds bubbly and seems to be enjoying life! (Not that I am not enjoying life but it’s a different level altogether, not that I am living in a lower level compared to her but that I feel I lack the exposures of life).
Another thing that I now realized is that they are more organized in their thoughts compared to me. *Knocks head against wall* I want to be more organized but I guess it’s the chain of thoughts I need to work on to be better.
Things are just coming to my mind… Was just speaking to Isabel about handwritings and how we can see a person’s character via handwritings. I start to wonder and analyze my very own handwritings. Guess what do I see myself in my handwritings? Guess… Hahaha… Should I expose myself here? Who cares? I mean, it’s strength to admit about the things about myself.
I like to write in upper casing and tend to keep it at a uniform height. What I feel is that I am very direct, keep things in order, straightforward, like things to be perfect etc… What other people think about me when I write is that, I’m faithful!
What do you think? It’s all up to you to think and comment. Anyway, I cannot force anyone to like me but can make everyone to hate me. However, who likes to be hated? I certainly do not…
What changes do I want to see myself in the period of July till December 2005?
I want to:
1. grow up to be a better man to the best knowledge I know how
2. be able to motivate the younger ones in cell to study harder and be on fire for God
3. rise up to be a good example to the rest of my cell group members, family members, colleagues and friends (Both internet and real life friends)
4. excel in my work – (being able to perform all task given to me and doing it with excellence)
5. be more faithful in the tasks given, not only to complete it but doing it well
6. have a more positive attitude in life
7. be more exposed in the events of the world; not to be out of touch with the world
8. have more friends than hi and bye friends
9. able to fulfill every single cent committed to building fund
10. see my weight reducing as day goes – By end December 2005; 65kg
These are the things I can think of at the moment. Nevertheless, what is the thing I want to attain most in this period of my life, rather, my life time goal is to be more Spiritual, Wiser and even more Discerning all the days of my life. Also, not forgetting to love God more and more each day!!! Of course, for this to happen, I must never forget that Jesus MUST BE THE CENTRE OF FOCUS and ATTENTION of my life!!!
posted by Calvin Chung @ 10:13 AM
Email me: calvin.othniel@gmail.com
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